Family influence in motivating children

Motivating Children.

Humans are social beings always need interaction with other people in her life. Various interactions can occur, ranging from sole proprietorships to interactions involving many individuals or groups. The first forms of individual interactions with other individuals is the family. Family plays an important role here as it serves as the first and long term for the development of a child.

Seen from the perspective of sociology, the family is the smallest group of human society. Families as part of the society have duties imposed by society, such as: birth of new citizens, maintaining the physical needs of family members, prepare children to act as citizens, and social control. Today, those tasks are no longer fully implemented independently by the family. For example, in terms of education, this task already submitted to formal institutions in society. Formal institutions such as schools, places of course, daycare, Sunday school, and others. Still, families that immediate neighborhood of a child and give meaning to their own in child development and lower secondary.

Characteristics determine how many families are considered the best in educating children. The family also became a member of the family context in which the development of teaching and learning from each other. The learning process itself can occur consciously or unconsciously. Examples of learning is conscious and is intended to provide a new notion for example: Parents teach their children to always eat regular and nutritious four of five perfectly healthy, wash your hands before eating, to pray before meals, and so on. While learning can also occur that are not recognized or is not intended to be learned by children such as: children playing with wearing his mother, his mother's high heels, lipstick and even saw the appearance of her mother because every morning when leaving the office. There is another example of unconscious learning the negative and harmful, such as children become frequent fights and issuing harsh words because they often see and hear their parents arguing and throwing another rant.

In addition to being space for learning, family is also a source of acceptance, love and support are central to an individual because as social beings, humans always need other people around to provide assistance or encouragement when he was having problems or distress, or when faced with situations perceived pressure. Support from family, especially parents, to make children feel accepted and recognized as a human being. This support can take the form of behavior to encourage, assist, cooperate and show approval, love and physical affection.

Support from other people around the individual needs from childhood to adulthood. For children who are at the stage of primary school age, whose support is crucial to the achievement of independence and academic tasks in school. At this time the matter achievement issues that are considered important to the parents along with the child's ability. At this time, the child has to deal with important developmental tasks that school achievement.

The duties of the school is often a source of problems for children. Encountered many lazy kids go to school because of avoiding penalties not doing their jobs. In schools also often encountered smart student but not excited. From this it can be seen that motivation plays an important role in the achievement of business. In pursuit of achievement, the child is directed by motivation. Besides influenced by the intensity - high or low - motivation, children are also affected by the direction of motivation. Is the child's focus of attention is the job itself and not reward beyond itself or focus more on the benefits outside of himself. The first direction of achievement motivation often also referred to as task-oriented (task orientation / task-oriented) or also known as mastery. Characteristics are children earnestly doing something because he wanted to become an excellent student mastery of a particular material and the standards are set for himself. For example, when the teacher requires each student do 10 math problems every day, the more children for mastering mathematics felt that he had to do 20 math problems every day. Students with a direction on the task-oriented motivation is to realize that the outcome depends entirely on its business so that it will use effective learning strategies. He will be deeply involved in learning activities in the classroom (teacher attention, happy to answer questions, etc..) And when it will find it difficult to survive and to find alternative solutions to problems (ask the teacher, looking for information on the Internet, etc.).

Instead students with motivation toward rewards (ego orientation or performance orientation) would be more attracted to rewards outside itself that is beneficial to him, such as praise and appreciation from others, receive gifts, to please others, and so on. Students with motivational direction is more concerned with the judgment of others that tend to always look at the norm and always want to beat everyone else. Such students will be working on a math problem more than others because he did not want to lose anyone else.

Students who do things because he wanted to be a superior student achievement would refer to himself. These students view learning as an end in and mastery of a task or lesson as a result. On the other hand, students who do something more because he wanted to get in return, will be based on the people around him. Students will look at the success of this kind based on the reactions of others to what he does. There is a tendency to do the tasks most easily generate praise from parents and ignore the other task. Such students tend to avoid tasks that do not get an appraisal as Career Guidance lessons at school, or will override skill learning tasks, arts, sports compliment he will not bring a parent if got good grades, than if he gets good grades for math, English, and so on. In some cases, the assessment derived from mathematics is often considered more proud than the valuation of other subjects.

Direction of achievement motivation adopted a child, whether himself or another person, is determined by many things in between internal factors such as the child's perception of the ability of self-interest in a subject matter, gender, as well as external factors such as home and school environment. Among the things that affect child achievement motivation, family environment especially parents is a factor that is considered the highest contribution. This is because the family is the basis of the child's development and in which the interaction of intense among its members, especially the parent-child interaction. The development of achievement motivation age children are before the child reaches the age of ten. When children are taught to always get a prize if he won, he would learn, even into adulthood, it is proper that he was awarded when others wanted him to do something well.

The study authors at primary school age children of the relationship between students' perception of parental support with goal orientation in math (2001) concluded that there is a strong positive relationship between parental support perceived by the child in the direction of achievement motivation. During the elementary school age, math cheerfully considered as a difficult subject. In addition due to the characteristics of mathematics that involves numbers and symbols, and explain how classroom teachers also affect the child's assessment of the difficulty level math. Research shows that the more a child feels the parents supported him in the face in school, children toward achievement motivation towards mastery, master the task well and be good students instead of just wanted to get a gift from her parents even though it is undeniable that in the child as well There achievement orientation that leads to get praise or recognition. However, based on research, students who have accomplished the same in both directions do not have academic achievement as well as students studying for purely really want to be an expert in that field (mastery). In short, the direction of achievement motivation which leads to the desire to be a smart student achievement and achievement in the field is the most ideal way for a student.

From various studies can also be seen that the support of the people around the child's meaningful, especially parents, can be overcome or at least reduce the negative effects of stressful events, and parents support can increase motivation and involvement in classroom activities.

As an individual, elementary school-aged children have the developmental tasks that focus on achieving self-reliance and business achievement in school. In pursuit of these developmental tasks, children will meet many challenges and difficulties. How did the people around the child, especially parents, to treat children with respect to their development tasks - whether the child is treated either positive or negative, is a support or resistance - will affect the child's self assessment against itself and affect the child's perspective on the situation, including a situation in which demands for achievement.

Many parents consider providing just enough support to give children adequate learning facilities or give gifts when children succeed in their studies. Indeed, a child's perception of parental support is slightly different to what parents perceived as a behavior support. Some behaviors are considered children as a form of parental support are: the presence of a reliable, direction, attachment (attachment), giving a sense of worth, and parenting. Based on the five components of the Weiss, here are some practical suggestions that can be applied to parents.

Stand child while doing schoolwork. Many parents consider it necessary to accompany children while doing homework because the parents did not hear her ask to be accompanied. Does your child ask or do not ask for help when studying, your presence at his side is a form of attention to him. Regrettably, there are parents who feel the need to escape when his assignment because the baby would not worry if asked, he could not answer. As a parent, you are required to be prudent at the time to answer questions your child may not know or have forgotten how to do it. Challenge the children to solve their own example by saying "Mama think you'd actually be able to do it just be you might forget ya boy. Let's try again. "It indirectly also can train the child's independence.

Listen to the story as well as any complaints. Take a moment to listen to your experiences in school that day. A long time is not necessarily better than a short time only as long as you are really focused on him and avoid doing other activities such as watching TV or doing your own work. When you are completely focused on him, the child will feel valued and supported you. You are also expected to provide feedback on what your child has done. If what he did was a good day, grant awards.

Help him when experiencing difficulties and generate enthusiasm when he failed. Suppose when he scored less well in school and got a ribbing from his friends. Failure to master developmental tasks in three school age can cause serious consequences, namely making children feel inferior, thus causing discomfort and happy. Second, the failure of social rejection can lead to children. Children will feel left out and do not have any friends. Third, the failure can be difficult for him to master developmental tasks later age stages. Knowing that you are always there when needed, the child will feel at ease because he realized there was a reliable person to help him when he is facing problems or difficulties. Provide your time when children need it will also make the child a tendency to run into problem solving is not good, ie socially unhealthy or drug dependence, reduced or no.

Be consistent with the applicable rules at home and be a good example for your child. Discipline is good for elementary school age children where at primary school age, one of the developmental tasks that develop a conscience, morality, and values ​​(value). By the time you've set your child should learn at 4-5 pm each day, do not take a walk on the hour. Your child will become confused and think there is a 'gap' when he wanted to do something else that he is more like 4-5 hours in the afternoon than learning.

Show your love to him in the form of behavior. View through a friendly tone of voice, facial expressions and posture friendly warm. Speak gently and do not hesitate to show affection the way around her, stroking her hair, and so on. Closeness and intimacy with a child can give a sense of security to children. There are times where your children break the rules and you are angry with him, try to keep your voice tone and body language remain neutral but to convey the core message to him that he was breaking the rules and making you sad.

In the end you should convey to the child that the achievements in every field as significant for the parents. Provide recognition or appreciation of the capabilities and quality of the child in any field as long as it is positive. This support will make the children feel welcome and appreciated him. Frequently encountered cases parents instilled in their children that a particular subject is more important than other subjects. Parental attitudes toward the subject, for example, often complained that her difficult math achievement in academics or better than academic achievement, indirectly will be embedded to the mind of the child.

By showing the best support you as a parent, the child will be encouraged to direct underachievement motivation toward task-orientation or mastery so that learning becomes a positive attitude. Children can develop autonomously learn an effective way so that later grew into the personal adaptive challenges in addressing the human resource competition intensifies in the coming era.